The best part of the #Sparty victory tonguebath is switching the TV to #Goldfinger
In our previous episode, we were headed to the Goathead Saloon.
Nope. Closed, for sale, DOA.
Deader than SAE after the YouTube.
Saturday Night is a Great Night for night two of a weekend bar crawl. It has to be better than Friday in Scottsdale with its lookalike clubs, bar-rescued overpriced theme bars and packs of hot but insipid ASU chicks. Plenty of milf-y Scottsdale goodness showing off their silicone, too, but they’re all paired up. Their dudes are eager to show off the handiwork and stake their claim by mashing while you do your demoralized shuffle past the minivan hormone showcase.
So Saturday, aim lower. Some place with Earth-based beer prices. Some place unfamiliar with artisanal ice. In four words
Monkey Pants: Dark. Try the Cheese.
Yucca Tap Room: Too fucking many hipsters.
Uncle Monkey: pandemographic crowd; well-lit dive
On deck the next time there’s a night off? The Goathead Saloon.
TextNonFails – when you say “jalapeno” and the phone types “hell up in you.”
Today marks my third wrestling match with the 30 foot long anaconda. For those of you that wonder, this is the process: The Prep: the “Koolaid” sucks, but it’s a million times better if you follow your own “one-way” signs instead of the “alternative” prep. (NTTAWWT) It’s not the bowl or the horcrux that’s empty at the end.