The Bats Don’t F*** Around

In true Weekly World News *style* I offer *proof* that Hunter Thompson wasn’t stoned on the road to Las Vegas. OK, not so much proof as a lame excuse to quote him and blast out a weird photo…

We were somewhere around Barstow on the edge of the desert when the drugs began to take hold. I remember saying something like “I feel a bit lightheaded; maybe you should drive….” And suddenly there was a terrible roar all around us and the sky was full of what looked like huge bats, all swooping and screeching and diving around the car, which was going about a hundred miles an hour with the top down to Las Vegas. And a voice was screaming: “Holy Jesus! What are these goddamn animals?”

Then it was quiet again. My attorney had taken his shirt off and was pouring beer on his chest, to facilitate the tanning process. “What the hell are you yelling about?” he muttered, staring up at the sun with his eyes closed and covered with wraparound Spanish sunglasses. “Never mind,” I said. “It’s your turn to drive.” I hit the brakes and aimed the Great Red Shark toward the shoulder of the highway. No point mentioning those bats, I thought. The poor bastard will see them soon enough.”

Beware of Vampires – August ’89 Over the Rio Grande, New Mexico

Also, “Vampires DO live in Daytona” according to grafitti under the pier there.So maybe it WASN’T the drugs. Maybe Just Say[ing] No won’t help you. You have been warned.

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