Gravity: a law we can live without

The Swift Report: Foes of Evolution Set Sights on New Target: Gravity

Called the universal theory of gravity, Newton’s so-called law is taught to physics students everyday. But a growing movement of parents wants to change that. They say that Isaac Newton’s theory of acceleration and velocity is just that—a theory—and that forcing students to accept a Newtonian view of the natural world is unfair to those who don’t believe in gravity.

An accelerating movement
This small Pennsylvania town south of Harrisburg is at the center of the movement to force high school physics teachers to introduce alternative explanations of the force of gravitation. But parents here reject the claim that they’re trying to ban teachers from mentioning gravity, or the increasingly controversial Sir Isaac Newton. Rather, they say, their goal is to supplement the existing physics curriculum.

“It’s just not fair to the young men and women who attend physics classes in Dover that they learn about one theory over and over,” says curriculum improvement advocate Lorraine Dittie. “What we’d like to see is a more a balanced presentation.”


Yes, I know this is satire.

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2 thoughts on “Gravity: a law we can live without

  1. It seems funny to me that the evolution debate is being satirically-twisted into a debate over gravity, as if the argument for Intelligent Design isn’t ridiculous enough. The truth is, the theory of evolution is in a state of crisis in a number of states, and there is nothing funny about it.
    Less Evolved

  2. Evolution proponents needs to accept that it is a theory which happens to fit the facts. IDiots and CReAtionism Proponents need to understand that the Genesis story and the fossil record coordinate EXACTLY apart from the measurement of time.

    Couldn’t God have created evolution? Would that solve anything?

    What if the true believers could simple accept that the “7 days” story is a metaphor, since Samites or whoever the first Bible readers were had no formal education, but could understand a *day,* even one that happened in the past, and could understand that things must occur in a logical progression (US Foreign *policy* excluded) , but could not possibly be expected to understand 4.6 BILLION years – hence 7 *days* of creation.
    I know, I know. The Bible is infallible. and the words. even in the translation are divinely inspired for exactly the appropriate time and context of their reading to convey the message of the Holy Spirit. And shit.Buzzkill has explained it to me:

    Sock you stupid motherfucker. Yer going straight to hell. More to the point, the fucking Bible says 7 days, so it was 7 24 earth-hour days. I do not give a flying shit about the so-called fact that an earth day could not exist until day 3, or 2 at the earliest in the creation story. Also, Methuselah was 969 2005 American years old, even though the 12 month Gregorian calendar on which our society is based was not adopted until about 1582. God obviously planned on cynical Americans when he inspired the prophets 2000 years before America or the fucking calendar it uses even existed. Nimrod

    The hard core religious right will not be swayed. All thiniking people can do is try to inform the vast, sane middle ground. We do have some ground to give without conceding the battle. Humor is just one way to open a dialogue.

    Thanks for dropping by. Come back and comment any time.

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