Boobies uber alles

Attorney General John Ashcroft prepares to soil himself when confronted with a cold stone simulated boob.

In a triumph of good taste and adult (as in mature, not porno) sensibility, the Justice Department under head caner Alberto “I ain’t afraid of no breast” Gonzalez declared June 24, 2005 *tits and bananas* day throughout the country, in celebration of the Department conquering its unnatural fear of a naked breast. W00t!

Ashcroft Gone, Justice Statues Disrobe

The Associated Press
Friday, June 24, 2005; 7:24 PM

WASHINGTON — With barely a word about it, workers at the Justice Department Friday removed the blue drapes that have famously covered two scantily clad statues for the past 3 1/2 years.

Spirit of Justice, with her one breast exposed and her arms raised, and the bare-chested male Majesty of Law basked in the late afternoon light of Justice’s ceremonial Great Hall.

The drapes, installed in 2002 at a cost of$8,000, allowed then-Attorney General John Ashcroft to speak in the Great Hall without fear of a breast showing up behind him in television or newspaper pictures…

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