Here are my *highlights*

• Painted.

• Drank Michelob Light in an aluminum bottle. Expensive. Like drinking off the billet grill of your Ford Excursion except cold. Beer taste was meh.
• Took the kids *mountain* biking. Bear fell on her ass and swore off riding dirt hills. Monkey fell more and laughed it off.
• B to the E. Exactly like Budweiser + Redbull. Reminded me of the flavored *penguin beers* at Osco. Drank it in the car on a tonic water run for the wife.
• Scanned a bunch of pics to chew up my bandwidth.
• PPV’d a porno. By accident. I didn’t mean to put in the actual password to see what the tiVo would do with a ppv, but I didn’t know the actual password until the tv boinkathon got all moany on my TV. Since there was no undo button, I watched it, and was bored witless. Apparently, the *Hot* channel has dispensed with insipid plots to tie the relentless fucking vignettes together. As anyone who has efver watched Jane Bond can tell you, the *plot* makes all the difference – otherwise it’s just an anatomy lesson, or a case study in grunting as paralanguage.
• Shaved the *beard* and ‘stache. Seemed like the right thing to do.

Before

After

• Prayed for football season to get here soon.