Yes, THAT neighbor.

No, this is not about a Cadillac El Dorado

My neighbor hit it big at the casino. Big means leaving with an extra $2,000 and a healthy sense of denial about the thousands in credit card debt he amassed and has yet to repay from his almost daily casino trips over the last month.

So, it’s time for dubs!!!

He gets these chrome, 5 spoke 18s. Nice enough rims. Not too blingy. The problem is that the wheel hub diameter is greater than the interior diameter of the brake caliper – the caliper is grinding away at the wheel hub as he drives. The wheels are heat discolored, like the exhausts on a Harley. The guy at the shop told him that would be fine – maybe take a couple of days and then the parts will fit perfectly.

Me: You are a fucking moron. Take it back before your wheel hubs catch on fire or your brakes fall off, dumbass. You need new rims. Those bitches OWE YOU.
Lee: Really? But the guy said…
Me: *bangs head on hood. repeat*

He fixed it AFTER some guy in a Jag at a gas station told him basically the same thing I did. It’s good to be trusted.