Messenger Puppet

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what is so wrong

Why did ABC news do a Bush Torture bill rendition of my comment here.
All I said was (in couched language) don’t get your panties in a bunch over a politically timed revelation, and the fact that some computer geeks were stupid doesn’t warrant their heads on pikes. Oh, and I compared the relative seriousness [...]

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Proof that Chicago did not happen

See? Never believe what you read. No one I know was ever near Wrigley. In other news, never trust a fucking camera phone. One day’s CYA photo is the next day’s “beyond a reasonable doubt.” You have been warned. But not by me. I wasn’t there. If I [...]

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TV superstar

 
$50 of cables and a wireless card later, my internet shit is all over the TV. And if you think MP.com is the shit on 37”, imagine the madness of Steak and Cheese.  Or, uh, *whispers* porn.

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Jody No. 2

The cute one. Well, the first cute one.  Jody #3 was pretty hot, too.

she transferred to “my” BK Lounge - Immediate OMG.
Party Central:

Friday Night videos with 8 barrel and Jody’s cute roommate.  “Sharp Dressed Man” beats “Billie Jean” every time.
Rocky Horror Picture Show with 8, Carrie Welch, Jody, roomie.
Football games with her and Pod [...]

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Worst offense ever

No, not the cards or even those Bears

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Worst team EVER

Bears (to 20 pt deficit and Cards’ remaining shred of pride): C ya
Cards: This is how CU does it , right?
Cards: We suck.
Bears: Yup.
“Fans”: Yup.
ESPN: ASS. You suck ASS. You can’t even self-deprecate worth a damn.
Me: “University of Phoenix Stadium”? Fuck that. [...]

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It takes a nation of 300 million to hold us back

300 million?
Fuck.  That is a ton of people. (actually, about 22.5 million tons.  Adjusted for Big Macs and Denny’s Grand slam breakfasts, probably 50 million tons). Just imagine if everybody was insane enough to have 14 kids instead of 1.7.  Think of how many more WalMarts would be polluting the horizon.

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Miami gets “tough” on thugs…

The University of Miami is synonymous with excellence. Miami is a proven pathway to the achievement of excellence at the highest level, both in the classroom and on the football field.
Honesty, Character, Trust, Pride, Teamwork, Commitment.
These are just some of the characteristics that describe Hurricane Football.
So are these:  felony, embarrassment, lack of institutional control, [...]

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Heisman voters to NIU: Who the hell are you?

The defense held NIU’s senior tailback Garrett Wolfe to 25 yards on 18 carries, 198 yards below his season average of 223.8.
The Heisman race officially moved on seconds later.

Bronco Football Shuts Down NIU, 16-14 .

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Caption this

A. Aaaahhh. My ass!!! I shoulda skipped the Jalapenos.
B. Hey ref, Make them stop knocking my QBs down.
C. Dammit. Not 8 in a row!!!