Top 25 of the last 25

According to USA Today via Winding Road via Autoblog, these are the cars with the most impact (good or bad) over the last 25 years. Are they right or wrong?

1. 1992 Toyota Camry – wrong. Who f***ing cares. Maybe it made Japanese sedans challenge Americans better, but #1. Nah. Like a Buick anything, it’s not really relevant.
2. 1991 Ford Explorer – right. Kick-started the SUV madness.

Jeep Nation: Blah, blah, blah… Cherokee got there first… blah, blah, blah.

Sane people everywhere: Nobody bought them. Slow, crappy AMC trash, remember? Oldest factories, poorest trained workforce. Spirit of Dick Pacer/Gremlin/Concord.

3. 2001 Toyota Prius- right. The first non-freakish hybrid. (Honda Insight was first, but it was a spaceship)
4. 1984 Chrysler minivans – uh, yeah. Inventing a category is pretty significant. Eunuch-ized husbands everywhere have nothing but praise for you Chrysler bastards.
5. 1986 Hyundai Excel – Ah, the pleasures of Korea for just $4,995. Should probably be lumped with Yugo.
6. 1986 Ford Taurus – Definitely right. Brought American sedans out of the 1970s malaise. Aero, FWD, cladding…
7. 1990 Lexus LS400 – mostly right. Japan builds a better Mercedes.
8. 1990 Mazda Miata – princesses and gay men have their chariot. Woo-hoo. Overvalued on the list.
9. 1986 Acura Legend – mostly right. Japan can overcharge for a nice Honda.
10. 1996 Toyota RAV4 – alien/dorko styling has a home here after all. Yawn.
11. 1994 Ford Mustang – huh? Wrong. I love Mustangs, and I love the fact that they lost the tarted-up Fairmont design after 15 long model years, but whose lives were affected? The ’05 has more impact (new Camaro? new Challenger, anyone? Bueller?). It doesn’t belong here, either.

12. 1991 Saturn SL – wrong Another WTF? Nobody copied the business model, which was the only unique thing. Nobody copied the plastic fenders, which was the only other unique thing.
13. 1997 Ford F-150 – right. Pussified the manly light truck segment. OK. About right.
14. 2003 Hummer H2- right. It’s OK to broadcast your undersized penis after all. The ED cure of cars.
15. 2002 Mini Cooper Yawn. Yay retro, but impact? Not a big impact outside of people who wanted small and retro. See Miata.
16. 1998 Lincoln Navigator – right. The prototype bigass pimpadelic bling machine.
17. 1986 Yugo (GV) – right. This car cost as much as the Dick Loehr add on package (tire warranty – tires already had a warranty; interior protection system – $5 can of scotchgard; sport package – tape and crappy wheel covers. Shit like that) Memorialized in a fateful road trip to Ann Arbor one early Saturday morning. Marks the Yugoslavian subsidy of the American car repair industry.
18. 2001 Chrysler PT Cruiser – right. A retro on a Neon. Inspired a bunch of crap from Chevy.
19. 2001 Pontiac Aztek – YES!! Why designers should not drink Absinthe.
20. 2003 Cadillac CTS – Yay rear drive. The straight edges? we saw the look on the 79 El Dorado. Remember when Caddys had cool names? So maybe it belongs for signaling the American death of cool names. Lincoln drank the Kool aid in 2007. Chrysler drank a shot with the “300.” Right.
21. 1986 Suzuki Samurai – wrong. Uh, the trucklet was here before then. I lost my kidneys 4 wheeling in one in 1980.
22. (1994) GM Impact – NOOOO! Not a show car. The EV-1 belongs here.
23. 1998 Volkswagen New Beetle – the triumph of retro styling over the functional styling of the original. See Miata.
24. 2005 Scion xB Yawn. It is the Box it was shipped in.

25. 2002 BMW 7 Series – iDrive. Those bastards should be hung and beat like pinatas. Also, the uglified ass on the car, and being able to dupe your idiot clients into buying one anyway.

What also belongs?

The 1982 Mustang GT. That is the year horsepower started to go up instead of down, and the hottest Mustang could beat a Civic. Marked a huge turnaround for Ford (GTs get continually better, Tbird, OG Fred’s favorite LTD, Mk VII LSC, Taurus).

’83 T-bird. Truly started the domestic aero styling, 3 years before Taurus.

’86 Seville/Eldorado/Riviera- the bitter end of downsizing. My Mustang is bigger than these emasculated former land yachts. My car is popular, whereas those cars were pissed on by everyone – even Yugo victims buyers.

Viper – Dodge builds a “look at my big dick” machine to compete with Corvette

93 Dodge Ram – started the “look, I’m a mini Peterbilt” love hate styling of pickups.

What else?

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