Brainiacs on Parade

If it’s Sunday, it’s time once again to watch the Arizona Cardinals lose win in improbable fashion. This week, that meant see it in person with the Bear.

Where is the car? Reserved Parking. OK so far.

NFL-ness ensues.

The game has been over for 10 minutes. We arrive at the car, after needing to wait for the Bidwill “motorcade” to exit the property. “I am fat old and cheap. Step aside, little people.” We get to the spot. And the adventure begins.

KEY

RED

Brilliantly designed ingress.egress route for the orange lot.

P.S. There’s only one way in or out

YELLOW

Upper right dot is where I started. After 1/2 hour, I could move out of my space a little

YELLOW

Once I could move, the lower right dot is how far I could get over the next 15 minutes. Some nice dude in a van was waiting longer than me, and he let me in line.

BLUE

Eventually, I got pissed off about the waste of time and gas. So, I did what that wench to my immediate right who thought she would nose in front of me. Gee. Physically behind me, Temporally behind me. I should let you cut because why?

She cheated and cut through the rows, which were pretty much clear, since we weren’t going anywhere.

GREEN

X marks the spot where we passed our old row, 5 minutes after hopping on the cheater trail.

The line marks how far the van that let us in moved, and that is probably only because the car in front of him decided to cheat too.

TOTAL TIME (BIDWILL): 3 minutes

TOTAL TIME (ACTUAL): just under an hour – about typical.

TOTAL TIME (UNDER BIDWILL SCHEME FOR PROLETARIAT): Still counting. Van guy is probably still stuck.

Seriously, it probably would have been 90 minutes. It’s like Bidwill said “They’re done giving money to me for the day. fuck ‘em trying to get out.”

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