1. She buys you a DAVE
2. She buys you beers

Happy birthday to Dr. G.

1. She like-a the foot balls
2. stuff
3. other stuff
4. other, other stuff
5. Big dog
6. Big yard
7. Your kids are cool with her and vice versa
8. Has yet to be scared off by re-goddamn-diculous Internet ramblings.

(10.a. She’s cool enough to be let in on your Internet insanity)