Fredo Wang: Mercury, Metamucil and Meister Brau

Kalamazoo man defecates on car after downing 20 beers and crashing into several vehicles in downtown parking ramp | MLive.com.

KALAMAZOO — A 26-year-old Kalamazoo man was arrested Tuesday after drinking 20 beers, hitting 8 cars and and defecating on one of the vehicle inside the downtown parking ramp for the Radisson Plaza Hotel & Suites.

… the man told officers he was feeling depressed, went to the top of the Radisson ramp at 100 N. Rose St. and drank 20 beers to “get enough courage to commit suicide,” Uridge said.
The man, whose name has not been released, then proceeded to drove out of the ramp and struck eight vehicles, causing $75,000 worth of damage.
The man then got on top of a car and defecated on it, Uridge said.
Uridge said the man was arrested at about 3 p.m. on suspicion of drunken driving with a blood-alcohol level of 0.17 or higher, which under state law is called “super drunk.”

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