Don’t ever get married with children because divorce is completely fucked up, volume 999
Ex: I want another day, so I can have 8 hours (Weds. and another) with my kid during the week and 7 on the weekend. But not Fridays. Or Saturdays.
Me: OK – you’re mom after all. That works out to 55 days a year (instead of 39) for child support purposes.
Court: OK, although with 60, you get eggroll.
Me: What extra day do you want?
Translation: My plea for extra time was bullshit. But I just saved an additional 15% on my
car insurance support obligations.
Kid: I have school stuff on Weds. nights so I guess I’ll just see Mom for ≤ 90 minutes on Weds.
Me (to ex): Kid “has winter guard practice on Weds. nights for some period of time. I don’t know how long it lasts. We are open to switching your night to Tuesday or Thursday for the duration. I assume you still don’t want Fridays. Let me know.”
Ex: “I plan to keep Wednesday as is. [Kid] will come after school & I can take [Kid] to school when [Kid] has practice. You can pick [Kid] up from school when practice is over.”
Ex (to Kid): That parent meeting you gave me the FYI about? That’s your dad’s responsibility
Translation: I don’t even want the time I asked for 18 months ago. Also, I don’t want to have to give [Kid] a ride home from a school thing that starts on on my time ever.
Me: You owe half the fee, too.
Ex: Fuck you, man. I won’t pay to support my kid AND pay 1/2 [Kid’s] school expenses.
Translation: It’s all about the money now. Yeah, I’m still kind of fond of [Kid] and all, but not so much that I want [Kid] around more, or that I will support [Kid] above and beyond, especially if I can make it about why Dad’s an asshole and I’m the victim here and no we haven’t gone to Boston Market since [Kid] moved away from “home” and left me and…