In our previous episode, the response to a motion pertaining to a question of Turkish law and procedure had all the information about Turkish law and procedure removed as “irrelevant.”  Now it’s just bare bones facts: married/divorce/no judgment in Turkey, as requested.

Moe: Wait.  This paragraph is too short.
Me:  It says everything you wanted.
Moe: Also, respond to the 11 paragraphs of facts that really don’t mean anything.
Me: I already said the first 8 are fine, 9-11 is stupid and irrelevant.

Moe: No, you need to do a numbered list.
Me: You mean like it’s a pleading?  But it’s a motion.
Moe: Yes.
Me: Which is not a pleading, because we have seven rules about pleadings and one about motions, and this is a motion, which, as defined in the rules, is not a pleading.
Moe: Exactly.

Me: Like this? Answering the motion at ¶ 1…
Moe:  Like this – Answering ¶ 1 of the motion…
Me:  Is that really different?
Moe: it’s completely different.  Your way MAKES NO SENSE!!!

Moe (In a previous epoisde): Why give them that?
Me:  OK, we’ll admit for this motion only, so we don’t give them anything extra.
Moe: Nope, admit for all time.

Later….

Moe: Go make these changes (which require rewriting and rearranging sentences).
Captain Spock: What we require now is a feat of linguistic legerdemain and a degree of intrepidity…
Brick Tamland: BIG WORDS!!!!
Moe: No, handwrite them so a secretary can make the other changes (that you already made because you were working on the document).

Moe: OK , secretary said she didn’t know if all the changes were made.
Me: Where is the previous the previous version she would have given you so you could verify the changes.
Moe: I only got this.
Me: Really? Your  personal SOP is you get the old version with the as updated version.
Moe: I only got this.
Me: Really?
Moe: Well except for these old drafts (which is what she was working from).  The ones I ripped up and threw away.