Curbhunter: it’s not for the weak or stupid or poor. Unlike so many other things in my life lately, two of three IS bad. This guy seems to have avoided all three:
- not poor, because: year old Range Rover
- not weak, because balls enough to park a Range Rover outside the shithole complex that makes Mesa Ridge Apartments look like luxury condos.
- Maybe that is stupid. So is overnight parking in general. But look in the front seat! A GIANT PUKE BUCKET! That is
malice aforethought Eagle Scout like preparation. You can’t always find a Hill Auditorium trash can when you need one.
However, this is a still a curbhunter fail. Let’s look at the evidence:
- Streaks of paint down the side: dude WAS playing curbhunter.
- (Curbhunter includes weedhunter, alleyhunter and
- Also note the backfolded mirror – the rover was going forward, into history instead of having its legacy ramrodded from behind.
- In fact, the whole side of the SUV is a tapestry of adventure. Cool!
- However, much of that damage is from one shotters (not the same one shotters that required the barf pail). I think someone was playing sideswipe (or “snowy fishtail“). NTTAWWT.
- I’m no Range Rover expert, but from the looks of it, I would say broken suspension, as opposed to stylish asymmetric lowering (FANCY PARKING!)
And WTF? All the damage is on the left side. There is no acceptable excuse or explanation – Curbhunter obstacles must be on the opposite side of the driver, or else they don’t count – too easy to see.
Maybe what happened is the driver tried the trifecta of stupid:
Deathhunter Chicken Spaceship Curbhunter. Maybe this happened in a private parking lot to minimize the feloniousness. Nothing bad EVER happens when you do it in a parking lot
The only other theory I have is that Liz Lexi Mare did this, in a moment of Scotch soaked Smails-ian frivolity.