What to drive, if your name is Dan, you’ve got a giant stick up your ass, your job is watching a bunch of high schoolers and trailer dwellers watch other high schoolers and trailer dwellers make shitty burgers badly and your office is in the basement of one of those exotic spas. Read More
Search Results for: bk lounge
BK Lounge-mobile
I feel like I should be crammed in the back, while my BK Lounge coworkers, a crazy girl from a fucked up family* and her gay brother/cousin/gardener**, drive me around Westwood looking for some dude on a corner that might sell us them weed. Karma: No, she will not fuck you under any circumstance.*** Neither […]
Read more "BK Lounge-mobile"Escape from the BK Lounge: No One Makes It Out of Here Alive
You can check out any time you want, but you can never leave, Bill/Dan/Larry R.I.P., shitty silver on gray corporate Riviera.
Read more "Escape from the BK Lounge: No One Makes It Out of Here Alive"R.I.P., BK Lounge
The BK Lounge is dead. Long live the double whopper with cheese.
Read more "R.I.P., BK Lounge"You can’t escape the BK Lounge
You can take the punk ass teen out of the BK Lounge, but…
Read more "You can’t escape the BK Lounge"The Micah/Exxon Nightmare Burger

The original BK Lounge version wasn’t black from squid ink or bamboo charcoal. Just don’t even ask.
It’s made smoking it using bamboo charcoal… The buns are also smoked with bamboo charcoal and… the sauce is made with onion, garlic, and squid ink (which sounds rather delicious.) The beef patties made also contain black pepper.
Burger King’s new all-black burger has black buns, cheese, and sauce.
Read more "The Micah/Exxon Nightmare Burger"What to Drive
when you’ve got $895 of BK Lounge shift manager money burning a hole in your pocket.
And why not? 455 is a win. Vinyl buckets – get the ladies and hose off the seats as needed. Wheels for your nerd friends to “boycott” the prom. Shit like that.
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This is (no longer) a Burger King Town

Burger King demolished in downtown Kalamazoo; longtime location is no more.
Negotiations to have a long-time Burger King restaurant operator renovate and reopen its familiar downtown Kalamazoo location apparently bore no fruit. Demolition work on the 760 W. Michigan Ave. former Burger King location began on Thursday and the bulk of that work was to be completed by Friday or Saturday, according to workers with a Richland-based demolition crew there.
So, just like that, the evidence is wiped from the face of the earth. Thank god. No more: Read More
Cereal City Blues
It’s Fall 1983. If you had bothered to attend class, this should have been the start of your junior year in college. Instead, it’s your first semester back: back in school (but it’s at a community college) back home, after a year of unspeakable horrors in the Phi Sigma Kappa house. The BK Lounge is […]
Read more "Cereal City Blues"Yeah, Reza Still Hates You
You shouldn’t have threatened his dope stash. Or eaten onions before that BK Lounge road trip to Maumee.
Read more "Yeah, Reza Still Hates You"