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	<title>Messenger Puppet &#187; Final Bitch</title>
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	<link>http://www.messengerpuppet.com</link>
	<description>Grab a brew.  Don't cost nothin'</description>
	<pubDate>Mon, 01 Dec 2008 20:34:26 +0000</pubDate>
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		<title>Profiles in Shit</title>
		<link>http://www.messengerpuppet.com/2008/12/01/profiles-in-shit/</link>
		<comments>http://www.messengerpuppet.com/2008/12/01/profiles-in-shit/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 01 Dec 2008 19:09:28 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Mr. Wonderful</dc:creator>
		
		<category><![CDATA[Car and Driver]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[Final Bitch]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[Mustang]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.messengerpuppet.com/2008/12/01/profiles-in-shit/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[ 
Discount Cab 735, 9 a.m.&#160; Thomas and 16th St.:&#160; Hmmm&#8230; I am a male in desperate need of enhancement, but this cell phone call to 1-900-be-an-ass has left me feeling empowered despite my other shortcomings.
Traffic:&#160; Hey look!&#160; We&#8217;re all backed up.
Discount Cab 735:&#160; This looks like a job for someone whose brain requires enhancement [...]]]></description>
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		<item>
		<title>Coxsuckers</title>
		<link>http://www.messengerpuppet.com/2008/06/05/coxsuckers/</link>
		<comments>http://www.messengerpuppet.com/2008/06/05/coxsuckers/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 05 Jun 2008 17:21:54 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Mr. Wonderful</dc:creator>
		
		<category><![CDATA[Final Bitch]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[In Local News...]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.messengerpuppet.com/2008/06/05/coxsuckers/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[&#160;Cox Communications - we suck, so you don&#8217;t have to. 
Quoted Install of our transferred service&#160; 9.95
Actual price&#160; 50

the original 10
another 20 (10 each) for two cable cards, because &#34;installer&#34; called in a serial number.&#160; We had to call Cox to get the install finished and all our channels activated.
another 20 for the internet transfer [...]]]></description>
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		<item>
		<title>Happy Valentines Day</title>
		<link>http://www.messengerpuppet.com/2008/01/10/happy-valentines-day/</link>
		<comments>http://www.messengerpuppet.com/2008/01/10/happy-valentines-day/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 10 Jan 2008 20:06:06 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Pen S. Lordoscum</dc:creator>
		
		<category><![CDATA[Final Bitch]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[
]]></description>
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		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Lest we forget&#8230;</title>
		<link>http://www.messengerpuppet.com/2007/10/26/lest-we-forget/</link>
		<comments>http://www.messengerpuppet.com/2007/10/26/lest-we-forget/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 26 Oct 2007 20:50:32 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Mr. Wonderful</dc:creator>
		
		<category><![CDATA[Final Bitch]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.messengerpuppet.com/2007/10/26/lest-we-forget/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[ 
WIPE: WalMart is Pure Evil.&#160; And so am I
]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.messengerpuppet.com/2007/10/26/lest-we-forget/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Brainiacs on Parade</title>
		<link>http://www.messengerpuppet.com/2007/10/01/brainiacs-on-parade/</link>
		<comments>http://www.messengerpuppet.com/2007/10/01/brainiacs-on-parade/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 02 Oct 2007 00:01:11 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Mr. Wonderful</dc:creator>
		
		<category><![CDATA[Car and Driver]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[Final Bitch]]></category>

		<category><![CDATA[Football Is God]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.messengerpuppet.com/2007/10/01/brainiacs-on-parade/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[If it&#8217;s Sunday, it&#8217;s time once again to watch the Arizona Cardinals lose win in improbable fashion. This week, that meant see it in person with the Bear.
Where is the car? Reserved Parking. OK so far.
NFL-ness ensues.
The game has been over for 10 minutes. We arrive at the car, after needed to wait for the [...]]]></description>
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		<item>
		<title>F*** you, CVS</title>
		<link>http://www.messengerpuppet.com/2007/04/04/f-you-cvs/</link>
		<comments>http://www.messengerpuppet.com/2007/04/04/f-you-cvs/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 04 Apr 2007 20:40:30 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Dr. Gonzo</dc:creator>
		
		<category><![CDATA[Final Bitch]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.messengerpuppet.com/2007/04/04/f-you-cvs/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[If I weren't so sore, I would...



]]></description>
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		</item>
		<item>
		<title>My f***ed up Valentines</title>
		<link>http://www.messengerpuppet.com/2007/02/12/my-fed-up-valentines/</link>
		<comments>http://www.messengerpuppet.com/2007/02/12/my-fed-up-valentines/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 12 Feb 2007 15:15:02 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Dr. Gonzo</dc:creator>
		
		<category><![CDATA[Final Bitch]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.messengerpuppet.com/2007/02/12/my-fed-up-valentines/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[More reasons to hate this bull**** holiday, and especially, the whole “enjoy this gift of flowers, which are dead and slowing rotting already” thing:
Valentine bouquets &#8216;are bad for the planet&#8217; 
Al Gore and Ford beg you.  Save your carbon footprint for more important things, like a fat steak on the grill.  And those [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.messengerpuppet.com/2007/02/12/my-fed-up-valentines/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Satan is alive</title>
		<link>http://www.messengerpuppet.com/2007/01/23/satan-is-alive/</link>
		<comments>http://www.messengerpuppet.com/2007/01/23/satan-is-alive/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 23 Jan 2007 21:52:31 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Dr. Gonzo</dc:creator>
		
		<category><![CDATA[Final Bitch]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.messengerpuppet.com/2007/01/23/satan-is-alive/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[and living on Craiglist...

]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.messengerpuppet.com/2007/01/23/satan-is-alive/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Just the facts, man</title>
		<link>http://www.messengerpuppet.com/2007/01/08/just-the-facts-man/</link>
		<comments>http://www.messengerpuppet.com/2007/01/08/just-the-facts-man/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 08 Jan 2007 16:12:58 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Dr. Gonzo</dc:creator>
		
		<category><![CDATA[Final Bitch]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.messengerpuppet.com/2007/01/08/just-the-facts-man/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[More whine with that cheese...

]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.messengerpuppet.com/2007/01/08/just-the-facts-man/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Dear Qwest</title>
		<link>http://www.messengerpuppet.com/2007/01/05/dear-qwest/</link>
		<comments>http://www.messengerpuppet.com/2007/01/05/dear-qwest/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 05 Jan 2007 20:24:28 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Dr. Gonzo</dc:creator>
		
		<category><![CDATA[Final Bitch]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.messengerpuppet.com/2007/01/05/dear-qwest/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[You still suck, in case you wondered.
]]></description>
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