Category: Kill Your Television

Kill yours, not mine

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A brief moment of synchronicity, early in this shitshow of a year. #FuckYou2016 anyway.


Not only did Prince make a song about my old car [Ed.: Car? Other Ed. : Forget it – he’s rolling.], I found it on youtube right when SNL was broadcasting it on the tribute show so my computer could singalong with the TV.
Yes, I am easily amused, but also in need of those small joys sometimes

I really thought this was going to be a Pon Farr kind of year (ideally without the treachery). It started out with such promise. I still blame Mötley Crüe for starting all the shit dominoes that fell, screwing with the time line.

Peter Garrett‘s new solo album A Version of Nowis not my favorite. The music sounds a bit like the Oils. At least the sedated Breathe/Capricornia Oils. So there was at least some recognition, some comfort, like my once cool Chuck Taylors that are now retired from public use.

The lyrics are where the train tracks hit the proverbial quicksand. WTF, Pete. Truthfully, you were never that subtle in the Oils or particularly lyrical with your – uh – lyrics.

if I say so. Myself
if I, myself, do say so. Myself.

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Mötley Crüe: The End was tonight.

I love Nikki. Tommy is an atomic gerbil on meth. Mick Mars died 10 years ago but refuses to move to the next life. But God damn you, Vince Neil! Here is my 4-word review of Mötley Crüe: The End: VINCE NEIL[‘s] MONITOR TECH*. Vince has a goddam teleprompter. I get it. His speaking voice sounds fucked up, like he has to sing through dentures or something. OK. He’s been part of this band for most of its almost 35 years. That’s a lot of songs. Zoom (on the bass) here – lots and lots of songs. Fucking Walter Cronkite had a teleprompter. I get it.
The End

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WHAT IF… the reason all these iconic artists  that 2016 keeps taking away from us weren’t supposed to die. What if it is Motley Crue’s fault?

Stay with me here.

In January 2014, the Crue signed a cessation of touring agreement. No more performing as MC after 2015. MC is dead before it’s 2016.

the band theatrically signed a “cessation of touring agreement” that forbids Motley Crue from playing again after 2015.

– The Malay Mail Online. See more at: http://bit.ly/1UOGBhe

Tommy Lee
If the NYE clock doesn’t kill you, surely the drum coaster will. PHOTO CREDIT DUSTIN JACK

But shortly before midnight on 20151231, the indulgent (albeit really fucking cool) drum coaster contraption, broke and pushe the end  of Mötley Crüe back. by like 10 or 15 minutes. Mötley Crüe died in 2016, not 2015 LIKE IT WAS SUPPOSED TO.

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