1973

What to Drive

when you’ve got $895 of BK Lounge shift manager money burning a hole in your pocket.

And why not? 455 is a win.  Vinyl buckets – get the ladies and hose off the seats as needed. Wheels for your nerd friends to “boycott” the prom. Shit like that.
1973 Oldsmobile Cutlass
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Things Padlock Was Wrong About

1973 Dodge Polara
Mufflers are for the weak
  • That this car was in any way superior to my Fury.
  • Even with my JC Whitney electrical system.
  • Even with it being mechanically identical.
  • That driving this mufflerless shitbox to go be a boy scout leader somehow made me less uncool. Read More

Pimp Race

Green Eldorado vs. Red Frank Cannon Mark IVIf you ain’t first, you’re last. Green Eldorado vs. Red Frank Cannon Mark IV.
From the hat, and the pitched out smokes, I’m thinking it’s Fredo’s pimp dad in the Mark.

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Grandpa… bought a rubber

1973 Mercury Colony Park
The original was blue, like balls

Nothing says “ooh baby, I am ready to play” like a 1973 Mercury Colony Park.  To be historically accurate, it needs a dash compass (to find your way home when you have no idea where you woke up), and a blanket in the wayback to buffer the metal cargo area and the vinyl seats when your getting busy with the swarms of hood rats that are inexorably drawn to this bastion of testosterone fueled manliness.

To be truthfully accurate, the blanket was actually for staying alive if the car broke down in the winter – not completely unheard of, once the grand “gasahol” experiment of 1978 fucked up its whole fuel system.

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Oh, Thank Heaven

Somewhere in the wasted haze of being 20 something, I decided that maybe shit jobs at the car wash and the BK lounge were not all that satisfying.  Pod and OG were finishing college.  Phid’s college career was as off the tracks as mine, but we had community college bullshit.  His job at one restaurant […]

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