Signs of the times
The paper is gone, but get your tetanus shot, a master key and a weight belt before refilling. On the bright side, Superior AZ HAS protected the little cardboard tube pretty thoroughly. Nice work. (what’s that mystrerios spatter on the wall, though? wait, nevermind)
One Stop Shopping
Drugs Sex Violence? Mendoza or Bandaids. Tomato; Tomahto.
to say it: it’s NOT “ora-gaan” “ore-gone” or “South Washington”
Visual aids for the win.
BACKED IN and improperly parked vehicles will be towed immediately at owner’s expense
Really?
Reserved for Fuel Efficient Vehicle Parking Only
Lamborghini Gallardo: Italian for fuel efficiency.
(HT: http://www.facebook.com/Autoblog)
oh sure, that’s easy enough
Quick Sign Parking
ONLY
OR: $2.00 Per Hour for Others
Pay Inside Before Parking
You had me until that last line. Pay inside before parking? Exactly how do I do that, short of entering your parking lot in order to read this sign, then DRIVING INTO Parking elsewhare and walking into YOUR FUCKING STORE to prepay to park outside in your lot, since you don’t want me to park without paying first?
Giant Mall: Have some VIP tickets to an early screening of the new Leo movie, Inception.
Harkins: Yup, you’re on the list
Douchebag at the theater door: Wait here, while I seat every other person waiting!
Harkins: *friendly banter* Continue reading
Service to our favorite strip club that is. Neither of us gives a shit that you took a cab home. Your Cordoba is soiling our parking lot with its ugliness. That ends now.
yeah you'll get fucked at Christie's but not how you want. Too bad you spent all your cash on strippers and beer. And bribing the bouncer for a table.
Delivery In Rear Only
It’s one thing if you are Hispanic in Selma, Arizona and quite another if you are a meth head hooker. Or your name is Lurlene.
Do Not Turn Off Water