Tag: Ford

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What is Fancy Parking?
Fancy Parking is many things to many people. It’s a way of life, a philosophy, a global movement, and honestly, any attempt to define it would be an insult to Thousands of Fancy Parkers worldwide. But essentially it’s reversing your car into a parking space

This is easier said then done.  If you’re driving a Pinto with a glass hatch and think to fold the rear seat down ahead of time, no problem.  But what about a 1978 Lincoln Continental?  It’s 20 feet long and at least half that length is behind you. Good luck guesstimating where the rear of the car ends and an unfortunately placed light pole at the convenience store begins, especially through gunslit windows and puny mirrors.

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Am I turning into my grandfathers? Last year it was this:

1978 Lincoln Continental Town Car

This was the old man’s dream:  power windows, power locks, power motor, plus style and gravitas.

Karma: I don’t think he lusted after the falling apart piece of shitness of this particular example.

He had the money, but had to wait for the old lady to die off before he could spend it freely on the car he always wanted.

This year, it’s this:

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If you could see tomorrow the way it looked to Ford in model year 1981, you’d say:  wow, the bottom was rocky but maybe good things happen if we follow these bubbles up.  from all reports, the 1981 “world car” was a disaster: overweight, underpowered and handling quirks that made the first Corvair seem predictable. The 1982 Escort grew worlds better (a 2/10 is infinity better than a 0/10).  The 1982 Mustang even more so.

The first Fox Mustang was OK.  The turbos blew up if you let off at high rpm, but TRX and Cobra graphics and a 140 hp 302 were pretty cool, if not mind-numbingly fast.

1979 Mustang Cobra
1979 Mustang Cobra

Then 1980 happened.  Per wiki:

Following the second oil crisis in 1979, the 302 cu in (4.9 L) was dropped in favor of a new 255 cu in (4.2 L) V8 due to its better fuel economy. It was the only V8 offered in 1980 and 1981. Basically a de-bored 302, the 4.2 L V8 had restrictive heads and managed to produce 120 hp (89 kW), the lowest power ever for a Mustang V8. Compounding the lack of power, the 4.2 L was mated only with the three-speed automatic transmission. This meant the 2.3 L Turbo 4 was the sole “performance” engine. However, the Turbo 4 was plagued with reliability issues from its release. Inadequate lubrication led to premature turbo failure and even some engines catching fire.

Motor Trend at the time mocked the 1980 Mustang “Cobra” V8 that would lose a 0-60 race to a 1980 Honda Civic.  Nadir is not too strong of a word.

Then, someone in Dearborn replaced their regular coffee saltpeter with Folger’s Viagra.

1982 Ford Mustang GT 302 HO First Drive – Motor Trend.

You can feel it in the air and see in the quickened pace of everyday business. Suddenly, the excitement, the energy, the pride are palpable. Even in the midst of severe economic problems, and after an absence of more than a decade, Ford Motor Company has decided to put itself back into racing and back into the high-performance production car business. It’s part of Ford’s new marketing strategy. Public reaction to this return to big-league racing has been overwhelmingly positive; a whirlwind of mail has told the company to start building something that’s quick, fast, and fun to drive, like the Miller Zakspeed Mustang. Ford has responded with a high-performance 5-liter (302 cid) HO engine package, applicable to all 1982 Mustang and Capri models, but best blended with the new Mustang GT or Capri RS.

The horsepower wars were officially back on. Read more: http://bit.ly/1boOO7c

1982 Ford Mustang GT ad
1982 Ford Mustang GT ad

We’re starting a new series, mostly at Drive-By Shootings, called “Go Fence Yourself.”  We’ve been exploring the barren Martian wasteland of Phoenix, lately.  What better time than high summer, right?  In beautiful South Phoenix and Maryvale, EVERYTHING has a fence.  Industrial park parking lots top their chain link fences with razor wire.  That’s how we say GTFO “welcome!”

Or cinder block, for a hearty handshake to go with your welcome
Or on top of cinder block, for a hearty ass kicking opaque handshake to go with your “Go Die” “welcome.”

What also dots the bombed out apocalypse of post-industrial, forgotten Phoenix is junkyards.  Some are official businesses, some are hoards, some are parts bins for the unlicensed dealers selling frankenstein-like, cobbled together deathtraps on Craigslist.  We even started a new blog dedicated to the fences themselves (because focusing is hard and the cars come out all blurry).

Inside the fences, there are stories told in sheet metal.  Sometimes, too, there are prizes.  (Sometimes there are just booby prizes.)  Here are a few examples of the former:

A Toyota Corona 1900

Toyota Corona 1900
When “Made In Japan” meant dead in a year.

A Hudson Hornet (maybe)? There’s a whole slew of Porky’s jokes, especially considering the sketchy desolate neighborhood of warehouses and strip joints where we found it.

Hudson Hornet?
Porky fell on hard times…

Sometimes, the prizes still run. (Or fly.)

1967 Ford Thunderbird
Red = Win.  Every time.

We invite you to drop by the other joints for more.

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