The Bible is Like One Big Hallmark Card?

Quoting its verses is like the cards I used to get that said “to a special boy.” It is a substitute for articulating one’s own thoughts.  It is a refuge – a sword and shield -for those who cannot string together their own words, or whose convictions need the imprimatur of some supreme being before they’ll let themselves believe it.

Case in point.   Continue reading The Bible is Like One Big Hallmark Card?

White wedding


It’s a nice day for it.

I just got this note about my sister’s mother in law

Grandma passed on into eternity last night. She battled cancer for years. Please pray for grandpa as he learns to cope without grandma. Candace let us know that grandma was trusting in Jesus alone for salvation!

Cancer sucks, and then you throw a Hail Mary. Continue reading White wedding

Donald Wildmon’s Fantasy TV Lineup

Guns don’t kill people, TV does – Wayne LaPierre

8:00 NBC Law and Order SVU Spree Killer shoots mother in law, wife, wife’s co-workers, others.  Killed by cops while pointing handgun at a hooker passenger in the car.

The money shot(s):  Topping the headshots, the double tap of wife’s boss, mom in a pool of blood, the cops shoot this killer in driver seat of his car.  He was holding a gun on a hooker in the passenger seat.  His brains and blood splatter on her face like bukkake. Continue reading Donald Wildmon’s Fantasy TV Lineup

Barefoot and Pregnant

Get to it woman – those Mexicans have a head start

Patrick Johnston
Friday near Zanesville, OH
I’m giving a lecture at homeschool conventions this year. My goal is to reach homeschoolers who practice birth control, who don’t want as many kids as the Lord may want to give them. I need your help with a title. Here’s the description:How many kids is a “full quiver”? Can the quiver be too full? What if you cannot afford to take care of your kids? Are there negative consequences to being “spread too thin” in having too many kids? Is birth control biblically justifiable? Are there biblically justifiable exceptions? Are there any forms of birth control that are biblically unethical? Continue reading Barefoot and Pregnant

Proverbs 31 wife

My cousin’s kid and my sister and her 7 daughters all aspire* to be “Proverbs 31 wives.” Setting aside the conceit that a woman needs to be a wife in the first place, I actually looked it up:

The Woman Who Fears the Lord

10  An excellent wife who can find? She is far more precious than jewels.
11 The heart of her husband trusts in her, and he will have no lack of gain.
12 She does him good, and not harm, all the days of her life. [Cool] Continue reading Proverbs 31 wife

The Bible is a blog

Just think about it – a bunch of smelly hippy dudes, writing down their stories – run ins with the law, road trips, dating woes – told and retold over the years and collected in one place.  Two thousand years after the fact, people like my sister treat that bullshit as Continue reading The Bible is a blog

Ugly Bags of Mostly Water

Why does the Bible hate freedom?  Why do fabulous powers exist, only to have the Bible proscribe them?  Why do Christians in one breath say the Bible is the inerrant word of God and in the next, say that it doesn’t say what it does, and that God secretly explains the plain clear  language’s obvious opposite meaning to his chosen ones? Continue reading Ugly Bags of Mostly Water

What Took You So Long?

 

Dear Jesus Freaks:

I stumbled upon this bit of “god wants girls to stay virgins until they are barefoot and pregnant in their arranged family courtship marriages” when i was looking for Ferraris and teacher porn.

In their “Statement of Faith” these folks insist that.

  • The Bible is the inspired, inerrant Word of God, and the final authority for our lives. It is literal, historical, and infallible.
  • God created the universe ex nihilo (out of nothing) by His spoken word in six literal days as the Bible states.

Fine. Continue reading What Took You So Long?

Alex Trebek: This song won’t played anywhere near the happy couple

What is “Free Will”?

I have been given permission and blessing from her parents and mine to enter into a relationship with her; one that has the goal of glorifying God and seeking to serve Him together in the future!! As we move towards a commitment to marriage and the commitment of marriage, I ask you for your support through prayer as we move through this stage of life. I am an undeserving, but blessed man!!

Permission? Continue reading Alex Trebek: This song won’t played anywhere near the happy couple