Tag Archive for Kids

The War Council is disbanded. – Me, after a frank and refreshing talk with the ex-Mrs.

The huntress revealed

Solve this dilemma

Your kid needs to print something on Sunday night at 8. Your printer is out of ink. Replacement ink costs about $75. Staples has your ink.  Staples is closed.  Best Buy probably has your ink.  Best Buy is definitely closed.  Target is open, but doesn’t have your ink. Target does sell printers that come with ink for $60 or less.…

The important thing to remember about ex-wives is that you divorced their ass for a reason.  By all means be civil, but that new her is still based on the old her. Don’t be fooled by the attractive package. – Me, after a surprisingly cordial crossing of paths.

UPDATE:  It’s worth it to have an actual two sided conversation.  There is much to learn, genius boy. Perhaps one listened to bad advice instead of opening a dialog. Perhaps one should have gone with one’s gut, rather than the reflex of the war council.

Aside

Vex

No, this is not a Weird Al spoof of a forgettable Motley Crue song. I’m in a quandary.  Winston Smith is dead.  No, it wasn’t from the rat.

Anyhoo, he left cookies – an open bag.  Is it wrong to eat one? The cookies don’t have a soul, right? An open back is nearly valueless, yes?

These are the questions I struggle with, to avoid real questions like who goes to the thing, what now with the kid and do I deliver what I wrote.

“Waffle Nut”

a breakfast treat at Safeway or a horrible (yet hilarious in the the Safeway check out line) exotic male affliction.

Motley Crue

Christine Sixteen

Like last week, driving the kid to school is an adventure in poltergeists. This time, we hop in the car and this starts playing. Immediately. Spontaneously, on my phone. On Pandora. In my pocket. Is it an electronic glitch related to Kid 2’s failing phone? Is my phone possessed? Since it only happens in the car, is my Car possessed?…

Motley Crue

Pandora’s Box

So I am kid 2 us driving to school.  We stop at the Kwik-E-Mart for a beverage and some cash.  We hop back in the car.  As the car starts, from somewhere, the first few bars of this… start blasting. However, the radio is off (because: kid driving). WTH? Where’s that music from? Kid 2: Dad, that’s you. Yep.  It’s me.  Pandora…

Drunk Ass Neighbor

Jimmy’s Got a Gun

Deja Vu All Over Again – My little one has some teen (and other) angst going on for a while now, and thinks the path to peace is following the example of the older sibling a few years ago.  The whys and whethers and if/when to call in FEMA are for another time Highlander. Anyhoo… Just to make my job in…