4.14.06, 3:09 a.m. Ring, ring… Me: WTF? It could be the Minister of Cool, even though it’s really late even for her. No, it’s my ex-neighbor, Lee. Fuck. what the hell does he want. Hey. What’s up, man? Lee: Big G. How you doin’, man? This is Lee. You might remember me from such bad […]Read more "Creepy and Disturbing"
Yes, THAT neighbor. No, this is not about a Cadillac El Dorado My neighbor hit it big at the casino. Big means leaving with an extra $2,000 and a healthy sense of denial about the thousands in credit card debt he amassed and has yet to repay from his almost daily casino trips over the […]Read more "My neighbor the f***ing moron"
So, it’s a weekend like any other. It’s raining* and I need to pack my 200 lb. TV and other shit into a pickup bed that’s 3 sizes too small. Yes, it’s GTFOOH day. Yay. Naturally, this means that my neighbor needs to see me – probably to nickel and dime me on the stuff […]Read more "Pussy Galore"
People still do coke. Mirrors. Rolled up 20s. All of it. People still do dope at the same time. And beers. I was starting to think I dreamed the 80s. Evidently not. Oddly enough, this was about as appealing as my neighbor’s other “opportunities,” which usually involve crack whores. (I.e., my cue to leave) I […]Read more "Stupid Things I Learned Today"