Tag Archive for Toyota

camry crash

Too Close To Home

In every sense. I’m driving the thing that is not a  redRam 1500 with a Hemi and a touchscreen that I REALLY want car to the office. Around the corner, I see a parked Camry with a critical ass implosion. It’s like my neighbors’ kids after one of their constant DR calls.  Plus it’s a Camry: a crash is an improvement.…

Lotus Elite

The Ever Growing Throng

We’re starting a new series, mostly at Drive-By Shootings, called “Go Fence Yourself.”  We’ve been exploring the barren Martian wasteland of Phoenix, lately.  What better time than high summer, right?  In beautiful South Phoenix and Maryvale, EVERYTHING has a fence.  Industrial park parking lots top their chain link fences with razor wire.  That’s how we say GTFO “welcome!” What also…

Toyota Logo

Toyota is that Ugly Kid that Sprouted into a Hot Piece

And I’m being serious here. If any of you have ever looked at an old Toyota Hiace (Toyota “Van” in the US) from the 80’s and 90’s,  in all its angular and absolutely diabolically ugly glory, you’ll know exactly what I’m talking about. First of all, can anyone explain to me how that aesthetic disaster made it past the first…

Mayor McCheese of Crazytown (artist's recreation)

Profiles in Shit

Discount Cab 735, 9 a.m.  Thomas and 16th St.:  Hmmm… I am a male in desperate need of enhancement, but this cell phone call to 1-900-be-an-ass has left me feeling empowered despite my other shortcomings. Traffic:  Hey look!  We’re all backed up. Discount Cab 735:  This looks like a job for someone whose brain requires enhancement too.  That’s me!! *cuts…

Prius

Kill or be killed

In our last episode, the Mustang of Destiny had obliterated the signature vehicle of the New Chrysler corporation: The Dodge Ram 1500 (15 more hp, supposedly). Yesterday, victim no. 2 Rest of planet: but wait, Dr. G. She is ahead of you. Dr. G: What’s your point? It’s not 1980 Mustang 255 vs. Honda Civic. OK, so if you want…