and it is a day of shit. HST is still dead. Me = owned by the judge on a big motion. Saw the old boss and his wife Leona Helmsley and Duloc-land kids. MRG did not recognize me. Wife did and stuck up her nose. RRRAAARR!!!Read more "It’s Wednesday…"
The famous secretary, Debbie Lovelace, quit today. To protect those of us who knew or suspected the porn biz from any WTF?! OMG! issues from the IT guy, I got to clean off her internet “favorites” including an administrator account here and this (OMFG! NSFW) in her browser history. Update: Apparently while in Vegas last […]Read more "Secretary/ Porn Star"
Gee, I can’t pay my $20K bill and I got kicked out of the club so I can’t even throw you some perks. But this is what I am driving these days… –A deadbeat client FYI, those are 44s. “Normal” penis compensators ride on 34s. Plus, there is an extra 6-8″ in the front wheelwell. So, […]Read more "WTF?"
Dear MP Forum: I never thought the stories here could ever be true. Then one day, I walked into my secretary’s office without knocking and… Man, when I started representing strip clubs, I didn’t think my life could get weirder. To be fair, it’s Mr. Boxter’s secretary, and to be truthful, she is not a […]Read more "My Secretary is a Porn Star"
“His voice was a low soft purr, like the low soft purr made by the opening of an ICBM silo.” Douglas Adams ruled. Mike Portnoy got me turned on to this author in hysterical geology class back in 1890. I used this one in a seminar paper: Now it is such a bizarrely improbably coincidence […]Read more "All it takes to fly is to hurl yourself at the ground… and miss."
I made a poll. –>
I have clients that operate adult cabarets. I also have a wife. I’m not sure …Read more "Where is the line?"
So I have this court case in Detroit for my strip club guy on an unrelated thing. I don’t live there. The bad guys file a motion. I ask the Court if I can argue my side on the phone. “Nope.” WTF?!?! I argue motions by phone all the time in my “home court.” So I go […]Read more "Moo"
Do you know this guy? Unfortunately, I cannot say a nice thing about him. He is on the other side of a lawsuit in another state. His motions sound like this (I am paraphrasing, but not making this up): Because Defendants [my guys] breached a contract, they should not be able to argue that they […]Read more "Some attorney"
Where this goofy ass name comes from… Once upon a time, there was a type A asshole named Critter Joe. He owned a consulting company called Critter Joe Enterprises. (He got paid to say, “you suck.”) Critter Joe Enterprises had a consulting contract with “Bongholio.” Bongholio terminated the contract because Critter Joe (through Critter Joe […]Read more "The story of “Messenger Puppet”"