A million years ago, my Dad bought my sisters and me a car. The first attempt was a ’65 Biscayne. I broke the idler arm slamming on the brakes one day. After convincing Dad that steering was an important part of the car driving experience, he traded it in as scrap for a 1973 Plymouth […]
Door #1 2006 Rock: Hi mustang. Let me chip your windshield. Geico: A Lizard Caveman cocktail will fix it nicely. No deductible. Me: Yay. Fastforward to 2010 Rock: Fuck you xoxBox windshield. Die from a puny chip to the sweet spot. Geico: Hah! no coverage for you, dancer boy. Me: huh? WTF? Geico: We don’t […]
Captain’s Log, stardate 2821.5. En route to Makus III, with a cargo of medical supplies. Our course leads us past Murasaki 312, a quasar-like formation. Vague… undefined. A priceless opportunity for scientific investigation. On board is Galactic High Commissioner Ferris, overseeing the delivery of the medicines to Makus III.